Trauma can affect anyone. But in many cases, our definition of “trauma” is simply too narrow.
For instance, many do not understand just how traumatizing grief and loss can be. Perhaps this is because all of us will experience grief and loss at some point in our lives. Because this is a common experience, we regard it as sorrowful, but not necessarily traumatic.
However, a loss can absolutely be a source of trauma. This is particularly true if the loss was unexpected.
How can we begin to understand why loss is so heartbreaking? And what can we do in the face of grief that proves traumatizing? Let’s dive deeper into the subject of trauma and loss to learn about the healing process.
Society’s Views on Trauma
We all know that grief and loss can bring someone to their knees. But while we may acknowledge the emotional devastation of this shared experience, we do not always understand why it can be genuinely traumatizing. In order to fully support people in their healing, we must expand our understanding of trauma and see how this description applies to a wide variety of struggles.
Grief Can Be Traumatic
Anyone who has grieved a loss knows that it can truly disrupt your life. Suddenly, it can feel like the ground beneath your feet is unsteady. You have lost your sense of stability. This loss can knock you off balance and lead you to question what you should do next. Experiencing a loss can be very confusing as well as saddening. And this experience often feels genuinely traumatic.
Loss Comes in Many Forms
“Loss” doesn’t just refer to the loss of a loved one. It could mean the loss of a job that provided a reliable source of income. Or the loss of a home after a natural disaster can certainly be traumatic. Losing a partner because of a divorce or the break-up of a long-term relationship can be extremely difficult to accept and adjust to. And yes, even the loss of a pet can cause genuine grief.
Questioning If Our Grief Is Valid
When we are trying to accept a loss, and we do not have the support and compassion of those around us, we can suffer greatly. All too often, people are expected to move on quickly after a loss. Even their family and friends may expect them to simply keep their chin up and get over it.
But this is not a realistic expectation. It takes time to process a loss—sometimes a very long time. And we need that time in order to truly heal and feel whole again. Pushing someone to “just get over” a loss can contribute to their trauma and make it worse.
Processing Trauma
In order to allow ourselves to process this trauma in a healthy way, we have to acknowledge just how traumatic grief can be. Trying to gloss over this only deepens the hurt.
Whether it is you who is grieving a loss or you have a loved one who is going through this, it helps to view grief as a form of trauma that often goes unaddressed. And the important part is to not leave it at that but to seek help. If you are struggling in the aftermath of a loss, you may find that trauma therapy can provide the support you need along your path towards healing.
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Have you been struggling with a traumatic loss? Do you feel like your grief and trauma have been misunderstood? You do not have to suffer alone. Reach out to us today to discuss your options for scheduling your first session.
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